Clean Closet!

We had a busy, fun-filled weekend, and Mavster was hoping for a more relaxing day today. I have been looking forward to a good time to go through his closet and add some organization to his room, so I suggested we clean his room together, and if he helped well, we would take it easy on the school work. After 3 hours of me organizing his closet (throwing a lot away! yay!) and Mavster going "Wow - I've missed this!" a bunch of times, we broke for lunch. He really did work pretty hard for the first hour or so, but then kept finding things he wanted to play with amidst the cleaning. He continued to help on and off, but not as much as I had hoped for, so we got back to our schooling efforts this afternoon.

I started by asking him to read another chapter in our book about Louis Braille, and when he was done, had a worksheet with some character questions on it. I sat him down to do that and walked away to see how he would do on his own. I came back after loading up the dryer and found an elaborate note across the top/side of the paper: "here is something in the boring factor." (Reminded me of the story of the GT kid who would write "irrelevant" across all of the worksheets related to things he already knew.) So I asked him about it - the worksheet was about halfway done, but he was obviously no longer interested. He said how he has done tons of worksheets like this at school and hates them, and he was trying. We worked through the rest of it together through discussion. It is important that he accomplishes what I ask him to do, but we may be able to come up with an alternative. So I said let's get the boring stuff out of the way and pulled out our cursive workbook - he said, "That's not boring!" and proceeded to complete a page quickly within our "5-min-a-day" timeframe.

 We are reading about the Ice Age, and although we were just supposed to read 4 pages, we ended up reading 12 pages at his request. "This is such a good book! It's giving me great ideas for Minecraft survival mode." Now, we have been taking a break from that game, but obviously, he still thinks about it. It was great to see him learning and enjoying taking in new information. I told him about the cave drawings we are going to create, and he said, "Then let's do it! That is definitely NOT boring!"

 We ended with some typing games, making sure he was using the correct fingers. He has learned a methodology for fancy hunt & peck via video games, but we are working on the proper method! I found this build-a-molecule game/learning game for Chemistry and he saw me testing it out and requested I download it to his computer. He then built molecules for the next 20-30 min before it was time to pick up DD7.

I think we had a great day - and got a lot done! Thank goodness I don't post pictures here - that closet before/after photo set would have been... um, impressive. :)

Time Flying

Wow! It has been 2 weeks since my last post. Seems hard to believe that much time has gone by. I would say I am finally able to relax a bit about not being a part of the event this year. Other volunteers stepped up, and things seem to be moving smoothly along. I have continued to answer questions and offer information to the organization, with details about what I would usually do.

Mavster is doing great. We are getting into more of a rhythm with our daily schedule, and I'm working on getting him ready to take more autonomy for his learning. Now that he understands the expectations, I'll set him up with more things and let him have at it! We have been following a curriculum pretty closely for most subjects, but I really want him to find his own passions and follow them. We all know he would do that for a video game, but I'd like to see a different area of interest.

Earlier this week, I asked him what he thought about homeschooling so far, and he said that he liked it - that when he was in public school, he would spend all day just waiting to get home. Now he's home, and he's learning, and he's done before lunchtime. Once he figured out that we could get our schoolwork done in 2-3 hours, he's been on board about working to get it done with a few short breaks in the middle.

On Thursday, we were reading a poem, and talking about the poem's rhythm, and I mentioned Shel Silverstein and how his poems all have that kind of rhythm & rhyme to them. Mavster got so excited - he wanted to pick up "A Light in the Attic" right away, but I made him wait until we were done since we were so close to finishing. Yesterday he picked up the book again and was reading poems to his sister and would not put the book down so he carried it in the car over to his grandparents, still reading to his sister the whole way! It was so good to see him so focused on a book and passionate about it. Every once in a while, he finds something he really needs to do that day - whether it is reading, or building with blocks or legos, or testing something outside. I'm doing my best to make sure that if we can't stop what we are doing immediately, that I make sure I give him time to pursue his desires (sans video games) later that day.

His favorite subject right now is science - we are getting into Chemistry by Real Science for Kids, and he really loves the experiments, and is really interested in the topics and taking them a step further than the book goes. I am glad I remember more details about valence electrons and electron shells. Second favorite is Math - as you recall, he was reading his math textbook for fun. The other topics are also interesting to him - he does want to learn about history and the bible and how they fit together, and he is enjoying those topics as well.

I have been reading more about unschooling, and know that as Mavster develops or re-kindles his passions in different subjects, that we will take a more child-directed path than we are right now. I don't feel like we're quite ready for that yet. I will of course follow an interest where it goes, but I also feel the need to make sure we cover certain topics as we go. I also want to make sure that our son doesn't feel like he can do whatever he wants whenever he wants - there are still obligations that he has to the real world, and we need to see to those first.

Right now, I feel like we have a good balance and feel really good about our decision to homeschool. I am also finally relaxing a little more without so many other things on my plate, and it is overall making for a happier, calmer household. :)

Family First

Tonight I made the decision to resign from a volunteer position that I have loved in the past. I volunteer to help organize part of an annual event in October of each year for a non-profit organization, and no matter how I do it, there is a lot of stress involved. It is probably just my worrying ability - worrying if everything will be done right, and then when I'm busy, worrying because I'm not able to respond as quickly as I want to.

I had hoped I'd make it through this event, but have found that I simply do not have the time/energy to keep it to the high standards that I hold myself to. My family is my first priority, and lately I have found that I don't have time for other priorities. I have devoted myself to my son's education - homeschooling - and that is the way it should be. My volunteer duties were put on the back burner, which stressed me out in its own way.

Our current schedule has been:
6:30 am wake
8 - DD6 to school
8:30 feed animals, chores
9 am - 12 homeschool / activity
12 lunch
12:30 - 3 "fun" activities / play
3 - DD6 from school
3:30 DD6 homework
4:30 feed kiddos
5 - leave for soccer practice
7-7:30 return home
7:30 dinner for adults
8:00 evening chores
8:30 bedtime for kiddos
9:30 Mama Bear passes out! :)

So, that leaves me little time to work on volunteer activities, which stresses me out because I'm not getting them done. I did explain to the organization in advance that I was concerned about my availability this year due to homeschooling, and I have been honest with them about my lack of time. I have already accomplished a lot - in fact, pretty much all of the hard stuff is done.

However, this week I noticed my son feeling more stressed as well as getting frustrated with me/himself a little more easily. Upon self reflection, I can see that I have been becoming more stressed, and it affects my demeanor. I'm not quite as happy-go-lucky as I usually am and am often find myself preoccupied with what needs to be done. (Did somebody say laundry?) :) At soccer practice on Thurs, I pulled out my phone to respond to some emails that needed tending to, instead of kicking the ball with DD6 while we were waiting for DS8, I sat there with my thumbs typing wildly trying to get caught up with volunteer things. But my DD6 needs me, too, and I know it affects her as well.

I am my son's greatest reflection of himself right now, and if I'm not cheerful, he is going to feel that more than usual since we're almost always together. He is working so hard to please me right now, and I have watched him reach his "frustration point" a little more frequently/easily this week. I am sure it is because I have found myself with less patience due to the stress, and seeing him feel more stressed finally makes this decision really easy.

I have struggled with this decision for over a month now, but I know for certain it is the right decision for my family. I already feel more peace in my heart knowing I will be able to be my normal, cheerful, self. And now I will not just be giving him my time during the day, but also I am freeing my mind to be able to focus 100% on him. Writing that, I realize I need to find a little time in there for me, too, which I will. I already do to some extent - we take breaks, I read, etc. But now I won't have to be distracted about this particular non-family thing that causes me stress - and the stress levels would only increase from this point forward for the next month+. I have enjoyed the responsibility in the past and seeing an amazing event come together for a great cause, but now my life is changing. I'm homeschooling my son - and my family always comes first. This is for you, kid.

Beast Academy!!!

Our Beast Academy books arrived last night thanks to the excellent service of Horrible Books. I love Horrible Ray - he is great at communicating with you about your order, and always sends you the books first - without payment - free shipping - and then you send him a check upon receipt. Seems crazy to me in this day and age, but he provides excellent service, and builds his business solely on word of mouth. Amazing!

So we started out with math this morning since so far this week we have been focusing on language arts. We went through the first few pages, did the first set of exercises, read a Horrible Science Magazine, and then took a short break. Except, Mavster picked up his Beast Academy text book (written in comic-book form) and continued to read on his own for nearly the next 2 hours! He took a break in the middle and taught me a game they had in the book "don't make a triangle" that we played a few times. And then we ate lunch, and he picked the book up again! This was our first moment in homeschooling where Mavster really got "in" to something and needed to continue until his thirst for knowledge was satisfied.

I know he just completed 3rd grade, and the only Beast Academy level (by Art of Problem Solving) that is out so far is 3rd grade, but it takes the topics in to a lot more depth, and he is learning & interested and gaining his mathematical confidence back!

So, I consider Beast Academy a huge success! Tonight at bedtime, he picked up his Beast Academy and started reading again!

First day of Co-Op

Wednesday was our first Co-op day. Mavster's classes are Drawing, Woodworking, and P.E. As a parent, I will be assisting with Cooking, HS Science, and P.E. We both had a very busy day. His favorite was making his own wooden tool box! He said he will not carry a back pack again, but instead carry around his tool box with his hammer & glue. Very cute.

The Co-Op meets once a week at a local church -and I was surprised how many different classrooms there were! Even upstairs! It is a perfect location for the co-op, and all of the parents I met were wonderful.

Another parent that was assisting with PE said that he was also homeschooling for the first time. Apparently, his local middle school sent a letter to all residents/parents that since the middle school had an "unacceptable" rating, that they would give anyone that wanted it a "voucher" for another middle school in the area, but unfortunately, there is not one in their town. He figured he could give his kids a better chance by homeschooling, and so far it is working out better than he expected! Lots of reasons to homeschool, all valid. These kids are so blessed to be able to have their parents working with them one on one so much.

Roller Skating

We all had Monday, Labor Day, off together as a family and enjoyed a round of mini-golf and dinner at our favorite place.

Tuesday, we had our second "Not Back To School" party for our local county. There were probably 20 families that met at the local Roller Skating arena. The Mavster went skating for the first time about 2 years ago, and it was tough on him - lots of falls and frustration. This time, many of the kids were using rolling-walker type contraptions to hold on to as they learned, and I gladly got one for him to try. But I intentionally didn't give him any advice or instruction on how to skate. He is at a stage where he wants to figure it out for himself - and as many unschoolers know, when a child wants to learn something on their own, they learn more quickly and for the long run. So I put on skates for the first time in 20+ *cough* years and went around with him a few times, then let him figure it out. It wasn't long before he came over and told me he'd figured out how to go faster - just turn his feet out and push! Fantastic! :) We were there for about 2 hours, and by the time we left, he could go around almost a whole time by himself, and was pushing the walker away from him as he went along to skate on his own.

It was a great lesson for me, too, to let him figure something out on his own - no advice/suggestions from me, and to see how natural/peaceful it was for him to learn. He was determined to figure it out on his own, never complained that I was trying to tell him how to do things. Overall, lots of fun!

"Boys Adrift" by Leonard Sax, PhD

It seems these days I always have my nose in either a homeschooling or parenting book. I know that I am not going to find the "perfect" answer to being a parent of two super smart kiddos, but something drives me to keep looking for answers to the issues I deal with every day.

I remember how excited Mavster was to begin first grade, and how within a few short weeks he was shutting down and hated school. We pulled him out of the private school and went to our public school who had an awesome teacher willing to work with him. It was a net positive making that move, but he went from having to be silent all day to a school where the rules weren't so strict and he had to work on his self control. He was soon labeled a troublemaker to some extent, although his teacher did a great job of staying positive. The skip to 3rd grade was necessary last year - Mavster was already bored and unchallenged in his grade level, and to put him in a classroom that would be all review for the next year seemed like a recipe for trouble. Moving him up a grade, we thought, would challenge him and hopefully keep him interested & focused. His grades were fantastic, but socially, it was hard for him with kids teasing him, a bully, and generally being in trouble more than the average student. I am not sure what it was about 3rd grade, but the majority of the students were simply not motivated at all to work, and Mavster did the minimum necessary to get by.

I have just finished reading "Boys Adrift" which suggests there are 5 main reasons behind the general lack of motivation we are seeing in boys these days:

1) School - kids are learning in Kindergarten what they used to learn in 1st grade - and many boys are not ready to sit still when they are five and they learn to dislike school right away when they are always in trouble. Also, there is a lack of experiential play in schools. For example, students are show photos of the life cycle of a frog instead of getting to play with real frogs and watching tadpoles turn into frogs.

2) Video Games - most specifically, violent video games. Boys (generally) want to be in charge of their environment. Video games give that feeling but without the real life situations/consequences. There is an negative correlation between how much time students play video games and how well they do in school. With all of the instant gratification, patience is being lost. The part of the brain controlling will power and motivation actually shrinks over time as video games are played. In previous generations, boys would be out hunting and fishing for hours...

3) Medications for ADHD - boys who have taken the stimulant medications in their childhood are found to be less motivated as adults.

4) Endocrine Disruptors - Plastics and pesticides that mimic estrogens causing early puberty in girls, and later puberty in boys.

5) Lack of positive male role models & lack of rites of passage to manhood

These issues can all be addressed - no violent video games and limiting others, more time outside, no ADHD meds (which are often used to fix the student instead of the school), eating organic, minimizing "bad" plastics, restoring the bond between generations by spending time with male role models. More time spent with just males (all-male schools were highly recommended in the book).

For us, our biggest change right now is the move to homeschooling our son. Not everyone can afford to do it, or wants to, but for us, it has been great so far. We are spending more time outdoors just playing and exploring, and will be able to hang out with kids of all ages, who treat our son with respect and appreciate him for who he is. The overall feeling of less anxiety in our son's life is priceless. He is smiling a lot more, and having more patience (at least a little so far).

I know we will rekindle that love for learning and find his motivation!

Friday

This morning we went to a local homeschooling park day - another town that is about 20 min from our home and has a huge homeschooling community. There were at least 14 families there! Mavster had a great time playing with several boys his age, and I truly enjoyed the adult conversation with other homeschooling moms! There was even one Dad there that walked through - talk about a group of protective Mama bears! When he first arrived all of the women watched him closely until they saw him sit down with one of the moms and we all relaxed. :)

Mavster said he learned that, "girls don't get very scared by dead bugs, but live ones make them scream!"

We are working on our methodology for "Friday Fun Day" for the Mavster after working hard all week. Today after lunch, he wanted to play some math games from school last year which was fine for me, and then I wanted to get a few school things done before the end of the day. We finished some artwork making our Shield of Faith, and then I asked him to do his 5 min of handwriting.

He was learning "d" today using Handwriting Without Tears, and he sometimes wanted to make an incorrect stroke which I tried to correct before he got too far, but he started to get pretty upset about it. "I hate cursive!" he said. I asked "Why?" and he got even madder. "I hate questions like that!" "Why?" I asked again and he had to take a moment to calm down. So we ended up having some philosophical discussions about schooling, and that I just want to help make cursive easier for him, and that as we reprogram his muscle memory it will get easier and easier. He also shared some more information about what he went through last year (and at the private school for K/1st) - lots and lots of erasing what wasn't good enough. His 3rd grade teacher was known for even making them start a whole page over and taking the (messed up) one and crumpling it up and throwing it away. Apparently she was also known for having a short fuse about things. So I told Mavster to let me know what things he didn't like so I could make me a "Mommy Don't Do" list. :)

So far, my list is:

1) Don't be mean
2) No erasing
3) No crumpling up work and throwing it away
4) No getting upset easily

Well, that's easy. I told him he could add to it and refer to it as necessary to remind me of my rules. Ah, perhaps I need to make a list of rules for him, too, now. :) We have been pretty clear that he needs to do what I ask, no video games during the day, and that he can disagree with something/suggest an alternative, but I have the final say.

I asked him what the best part of this week (other than our 3! playday outings) was - and he said when we looked at an example of the comics for Beast Academy (math curriculum) yesterday was the funniest part. Yesterday he was frustrated with Life of Fred. "It's not how I learn and it's confusing." It is a bit abstract - you have to actually think about the story and figure out the math yourself, although the solutions are right there if you need them. The reason I didn't get Beast Academy right away was because it is only for 3rd grade (so far) - which he just finished and I thought he would be past it. But what I'm finding is that right now he doesn't have a lot of confidence in his math skills. (Vent! Grrrr! He loved Math so much in K and the beginning of 1st!) So, I think this will be a fun and challenging way to improve that. We'll reinforce what he did learn last year, and take everything a step further. Beast Academy is not simple - and possibly a whole grade ahead of 3rd in some places. Yes, it is on it's way to arrive next week!

The other part that he enjoyed the most was "that chemical thing we did yesterday." Ah, yes, Chemistry, the Periodic Table. Yay! So, my instincts about what he would enjoy the most are pretty right on. We will plug through History/LA and follow Heart of Dakota there (he does appreciate learning about how history and the Bible work together), but there will be days where we follow our passions in Math and Science!

My favorite parts of the week were the play groups where our son was able to make real connections with other kids, and learn through experience with them. Living in the country, those play times have been somewhat limited to his sister and school. Last year, being advanced a year at school, those play times did not really happen as much as he probably needed developmentally. It just felt really good today to see him truly playing with other boys, enjoying himself, being free to experiment/learn with what was around him, and just generally learning the way kids should learn - outdoors. We do live in the country, but unlike my childhood, we don't live in a suburb with lots of other families/kids around where you could stay outside playing each evening. I am so glad to have found a way for him to have those same kinds of experiences with other kids!

My very favorite moment came at the end of our day today when we were talking about homeschooling and our goals, etc. I asked Mavster, "Why do you think we are homeschooling this year?" His answer: "Because you love me!"

AMEN!

Thursday

Thursday we had all of our studies done by lunchtime! Yay! We started learning Chemistry by Real Science 4 Kids and Mavster got a kick out of it! We introduced him to the periodic table, and then went through some food labels looking for chemicals and identifying them on the periodic table. The funniest part was when we were looking at a granola bar and we found it had iron in it! He almost panicked! I explained iron is a mineral we all need in our bodies to help produce red blood cells and he relaxed - but the look of shock on his face was priceless!

It was fun getting back to learning about protons, neutrons, and electrons for me - I always loved chemistry in high school.

Mavster then continued working on his "ScratchCraft" program. His Papa gave him some great pointers about version control this morning which he has taken to heart.

Last night he had soccer practice, and he made a great score one time (that the coach sadly missed). But at the end of practice, the coach was asking the team, "What kind of team are we?!" and he got answers such as "a passing team" but our sweet son said, "The kind of team that doesn't give up!" YAY for Mavster!

Can you feel the peace?

After our busy/stressful day yesterday, I planned to take it easier today. We had a planned play date with others from the co-op that we have joined that meets every Weds. We spent two hours at a local park, with 2 other families (6 kids). All 7 kids spent almost the entire time about 200 yards away from the 3 moms, in a creekbed that was dry but still had enough moisture to house some tadpoles and baby frogs/toads. They were entranced the whole time - running occasionally to the pond to get more water or whatever they needed, just exploring the way children naturally do when they are given the opportunity. Mavster came up to me only one time with his hands covered in mud nearly to his elbows to ask where the bathroom was so he could wash up. He ran back to play/discovery as fast as he could.

Once home, we had lunch, and Mavster had some free time to create a program in Scratch. He has a passion for Minecraft right now, which we are working on taming, and minimizing his time playing. He knows he can't play any video games at all until after his sister is home from school (3:30), and then we limit it to about an hour. So, he wanted to make his own version of Minecraft on Scratch, "ScratchCraft," and I was impressed with his persistence and creativity! He has created graphics so that if you click on a square to "mine" it, the square disappears and looks like it breaks apart. He has designed a game avatar, and trees, for at total of 3 different textures so far (grass, bark, leaves). When DD6 got home, he started to teach her how to use Scratch as well. Not for ScratchCraft, but the very basics we started him with last year.

Tonight, DD6 had soccer practice and Mavster played with some other siblings that were there while family members practiced. He had a small group of 3-4 boys following him around, and he was leading their pretend-play.

So, what did my son learn today? He learned how to make "mud glue." I think he also learned a lot more than that and the experiences were all very valuable to him.

Ah, back to the title of this post - what I am seeing in my son is a very calm, relaxed boy who is not stressed out like he was last year. He does what I ask of him and is upbeat about things in general. I think he even wants to learn! :) Yay! I hope this continues that way and keeps getting even better each day!

First Day of Homeschooling!

Yesterday was our first day of homeschooling! We are so excited to begin this journey with DS8, who I will refer to as Maverick, the Mavster, Mav, etc. It has taken a few years and trying different things in the brick & mortar school system to come to the conclusion that homeschooling is the best option for our sweet son. We also have a sweet daughter, DD6, who is truly enjoying her public school experience, and we support her in that! The school is able to meet her needs and keep her excited about learning, and we have decided that is the right path for her, until it needs to change. That's the good thing about living in a homeschooling friendly state; if things don't work, we can always change again if needed.

Yesterday, we had a short educational day because we attended the local annual "Not Back to School Pool Party." I was overwhelmed to see well over 100 kids at the party, and to realize that so many local families are homeschooling. Our local area homeschooling support group has around 2,000 members. To actually see so many children (happy, healthy, friendly, children) in one place really helped me know I am not at all alone!

For our curriculum this year, we are using Heart of Dakota's Preparing Hearts for His Glory. Each day has a well-laid out plan and is easy to follow along, and interesting for our son. We got about half of a day's work done yesterday before the party, and I saw some sincere interest in how the Bible connects to history which in turn connects to his life.

The party was a lot of fun - he made fast friends with another boy his age who enjoys some of the same activities, and really had a great time. He also went off a diving board for the first time ever! No fear at all, just went up to the end and jumped right off! Brave kid! :)


Today was our second day, and we have no plans out of the house until soccer this evening, so we could focus and get back on track.

We start out with a good breakfast followed by caring for the animals (dogs, horses, chickens). Today we even spent an hour out at the barn and riding a horse!

Each day we do some Brain Gym exercises to get us ready to learn, and also to help strengthen our eyes and their ability to work together.

Our first activity today included learning to draw a plant with step by step direction, and I was impressed with the detail and patience our son showed. He was able to work on it until he was really done - and I thought of how he might be rushed or forced to use color vs. pencil in regular school.

Mav is enjoying listening to stories on the couch and the ability to stretch out when he needs to. He is very good at listening no matter his position, and I'm working on improving eye contact when I ask him questions. One of our activities was to read a Psalm from the Bible, and we saw how it was different between versions - and even different Bibles that were all considered NIV. I also have a digital version which settled which one was the most up to date, but we had some discussion about how the Bible has been translated so many times.

We got through our language arts lessons and found that it took a little more processing time to figure out the alphabetical order of 5 words than I expected, but it improved with each exercise - he had to figure out his own method.

The most surprising thing about today was when I asked him to copy one sentence in cursive. He had been practicing cursive all last year in 3rd grade on worksheets I had seen (no formal writing paragraphs yet). As he began, I was astonished to find that for some reason, he had not been taught the proper formation of many of his letters. When he was done with the letter, it looked mostly right, but how he got it that way was labored and not the correct method at all. When we talked about it and he realized he had been doing it wrong for a whole year and no one had corrected him or watched him in detail before, he broke down into tears. He was so frustrated; cursive had been so hard for him all year and he had worked so hard to do what was asked of him. We talked about how if it is learned correctly that it is actually much easier on your hands than printing, that we need to sign our names and checks, and to be able to read cursive. We agreed on 5 min a day or one worksheet, whichever ends first. :)

I am so glad we made the decision to homeschool!